I’m thankful for you because you taught me that love isn’t black and white, it’s complex and exists in the grey areas of sexuality and orientation. And that platonic love can be just as deep and significant as romantic love.
I’m thankful for the laughs we shared and the four years filled with long nights of getting to know each other.
I’m thankful for the times you defended me and stood up for me in front of your friends who didn’t quite understand me and that through your eyes they were able to see the similarities we all shared and in turn became my friends as well.
I’m thankful you provided me the opportunity to open your mind to a world that was so different from your own.
I’m thankful you humored me and for your continued patience as we worked together through the very difficult and confusing feelings we shared.
I’m thankful you broke my heart because it showed me I could live without you, even though I didn’t believe I could.
I’m thankful you cut me out of your life with a cold, surgical precision because you allowed me room for perspective and to realize that it wasn’t I who wasn’t good enough for you but rather the other way around. And that my dependence on you was an addiction that stoked the fire of self loathing that you started deep within me.
I’m thankful that this realization came early enough for me to mourn, process, and to heal and that the years of my life that I gave you weren’t decades.
And I’m thankful that I got to have you at all, even if only in the limited way that I did and for a very brief moment in time.